was amazing.
and eventful.
veryyyyyy eventful :L
i can just remember telling anyone who would listen that everything's fucked up.
but thinking about it now, it's not for me; really for her (N)
but if they want to be sour about it all, and refuse either of us happiness, then they can fuck right off (:
MY life, let ME live it.
:D
i'm still very happy though ((((:
- MARDI GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS :D
-
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
nyepie- August 30th, 14:49
happy
hyper- omgwtfbbq
-
- nyepie
- August 12th, 15:01
groggy
hm.
haven't posted anything in a while, seriously cbf recently.
life's taken a downward spiral in the last month or so, and not just with me it seems.
everyone's losing someone that means everything to them, in one way or another.
i don't know how to feel right now, i can't really talk to anyone completely and truthfully, because everyone has their own prejudice, whether to me or to others. so i'd never get the full story. i just want someone to tell it to me honestly, but not in a malicious way, in a way where they can help me.
because god knows, i need to feel better than i do right now. any sort of good news would cheer me up ten fold.
i've not slept properly in too long.
another thing, results day is coming up.
totally shitting myself.
before, i knew i had someone who'd console me if i didn't do as well as i'd hoped; someone who wouldn't take the piss or have a go for complaining about marks that aren't that bad. someone that knew how disappointed i'd be in myself.
sigh.
everything i think of just leads me back to you.
- sigh.
-
- nyepie
- July 21st, 20:48
sad
i feel like my heart is being slowly ripped out of my chest.
why are you like this to me?
i try so damn hard, yet get nothing in response.
you claim you love me, yet you never show it.
i'm worried.
because i do love you, more than anything right now.
and if i lost you, i don't know what i'd do, as cliched as it sounds.
please, somebody help.
anybody.
- (no subject)
-
- nyepie
- July 16th, 20:44
- worried
Why do things feel out of place when they aren't?
The feeling of falling through life isn't a good one; worrying about the future even worse.
I want to hold you in my arms, I want to feel your breath on mine, I want you to love me as much as you say you do. 'cause I mean every word.
Your eyes dazzle me. Your smile warms my heart.
But most of all, you amaze me.
You, being you.
I didn't think anyone could make me feel this real, this whole.
I don't need to pretend anymore.
But then, if I feel all this, why do I still get worried?
Still worry that you'll find someone better, someone more attractive, someone better for you.
I love you.
Please, reassure me.
<3
- Writer's Block: Listen to This
-
- nyepie
- July 6th, 17:21
- calm
- Writer's Block: Music for Thought
-
- nyepie
- June 22nd, 14:56
Anything.
I put my iPod on shuffle on my speakers on the other side of the room, so I'm not tempted to play around with it when I'm trying to work.
Currently it's Sally's Song by Amy Lee (Nightmare Before Christmas)
- Birthday
-
- nyepie
- June 20th, 21:35
Well, I'm posting this off my new ipod :) just as a test tbh. It's a decent app :D
I had a pretty good day :) spending the day chilling listening to music in the sun is one of my ideas of heaven :)
I like the amount of birthday wishes too, it makes me feel loved <3For some reason, I just can't get it into my head that I can buy a lottery ticket, it seems really strange
xDPosted via LiveJournal.app.
- Writer's Block: Teen Time Machine
-
- nyepie
- June 12th, 10:02
The '80s.
I love the music & style
New Romantics ftw.
- hrmz.
-
- nyepie
- June 11th, 23:57
i'm happy, why can't people accept that?
i'm veryveryvery happy.
yet, you try and stop this, stating "bros before hoes", just because i want to spend time with Beth on Saturday instead of some of you, whom I hang around with A LOT.
also, the constant digs isn't fun.
soon, i won't take any more of it, and will just tell you to fuck right off; but atm, i don't want to.
just stop being so fucking childish.
and face facts.
kthnxbi.
- :)
-
- nyepie
- June 6th, 19:35
- loved
I had a great day.
I mean, amazing.
Beth <3
Ben and Meg, despite your continued annoyance, I love you guys too :D
It's like, after feeling so lonely these past few months, I've found someone I can talk to for ages, and about anything we like.
And that she looks so cute when she smiles.
My clothes now smell of her, already.
And that she's made me happyhappyhappyhappy!
(:
oh, and that when it started raining, she noticed i tensed up, and pulled me closer.
awwwwwh, i can't stop smiling.
things are going to be fun again.
- :)
-
- nyepie
- May 19th, 18:16
- chipper
Seeing as the last post was all about dreams, I might actually post something different :)
Things are okay, had a nice heart to heart with Will & James today about Life, the Universe and Everything.
14 exams left.
RS = okay.
English lit. = shit.
Latin = terrible.
Revised Biology just now, fairly confident with that though
:)
i'm in a good mood!
although, i have a headache.
listening to rolo tomassi ain't helping either.
>.<
- dreamz.
-
- nyepie
- May 19th, 18:11
- bored
Well, just for Lowri.
I remembered a dream :)
Well, I was wandering round country lanes (as you do) when I turned the corner and the entire lane was covered in police tape, stopping people from going past.
I turned around, and there was a man who invited me to his house for lunch. For some reason I accepted, and we were soon inside.
There, I met a man with one arm who offered to have a bet with me
If I could eat 1/4 of all the food in the house, he would give me his car.
A yellow Aston Martin Vanquish.
I quickly agreed, went into the kitchen and saw piles after piles of food.
Surprisingly, I couldn't eat all the food he wanted, so I lost the bet.
As I lost the bet, I had to leave the house so he drove me to Spar in Llandaff.
There, I saw Carys who proposed to me, and then we eloped.
Then I got woken up by my alarm.
This is the first dream in about a year that I've actually remembered.
- it's all over.
-
- nyepie
- May 10th, 20:19
- depressed
CSL is over.
god, did I not want this time to come.
why can't it be a lazy friday afternoon in year 10?!
maths last lesson, watching the clock.
took it all for granted didn't I?
Friday was hell.
Spent the entire of English sitting by Ben, trying so hard not to cry. Then the shirt signings, Lowri with her really big drawing and message. Then when Ms. D started giving her opinions on everyone, it was just too much.
It actually hit me that I'm not going to see half these people again. No more Ben being really loud. No more Lowri dissing James and Salil.
Got to the music quiz and cheered up a lot, but it still reminded me that it would be soon over.
Then my slideshow.
I promised myself I wouldn't cry seeing as I'd watched it over and over whilst making it.
But, it didn't work.
I was crying so much, I couldn't eat.
Then I saw everyone else crying and it tore me apart.
And seeing Lowri was the worst.
She's normally so bubbly and happy around me, but her crying got to me.
It ripped my heart inside out.
I didn't want that hug to end, it's going to hurt so much not having her around.
The chapel service was even worse.
Rhi and Will's reading got to me, made me remember all the good times we aren't going to have anymore.
Seeing everyone I didn't think would cry made it all the worse, Theo, Jack, Adam...
Town was fun, cheered me up. A lot.
But then I got home.
And cried my eyes out once more. I fell to the floor. I sobbed uncontrollably.
I cried for nearly 2 hours, until my mum came home.
I feel empty inside, there's something missing.
and it's not going to come back.
I don't feel confident at all with exams.
I feel like I'm going to fail miserably. And then my whole life will be ruined.
I'm never going to find love again, I'm never going to move on, and I'm never going to stop thinking of her.
There's nothing left.
- emotion.
-
- nyepie
- May 8th, 21:10
- sad
today was way too emotional.
i do love you all.
i mean it.
but there's still 3 of you that make me tear up every time i think of you.
and i love you more than life itself.
George, Lowri, Ben.
♥
thinking of not seeing you makes me cry so much.
erch, i wish i could tell you how i feel.
to tell you that you cheer me up everytime i see you.
"Hands down, I'm too proud for love. But when I shut my eyes, it's you I'm thinking of."
but it's too late.
and my heart feels like it's being ripped out, piece by piece.
not knowing is the worst feeling.
- end of a fucking era.
-
- nyepie
- May 3rd, 11:45
- sad
"Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in timeIt's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the whileIt's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life."
I've been thinking.
I'm not going to see these people everyday again.
fuck.
there's 3 of you it's going to be so hard to not see.
i'm just not sure i'll be able to cope with the stress without you cheering me up.
here's to you.
i've known you 3 years.
yet, some of you it feels like much longer.
i love you.
edit: shit, doing the slideshow has set me off :'((
"My dearest friend
If you don’t mind
I’d like to join you by your side
Where we can gaze into the starsAnd sit together
Now and forever
For it is plain as anyone can see
Were simply meant to be."
- Writer's Block: Swine Times
-
- nyepie
- April 30th, 22:11
swine flu. it's a combination of bird, swine and human flu, and is a new strain of the H1N1 subtype of influenza. one of the strains includes the last major epidemic, in 1918. Spanish flu, which killed between 20 and 100 million people. so, yeah, there's every chance we might all die.
however, the government do have treatment available. but apparently they've known it could infect humans since 1998. another government screw up?
Mexico, the origin of the virus, is seemed to be a poor, backward country where people die often. however, this isn't true, Mexico has a high HDI and the quality of life has improved vastly.
as for prevention of swine flu, apparently face masks don't work.
so all we can do is hope for the best.
- fuckers.
-
- nyepie
- April 28th, 18:38
well, I was quite looking forward to doing it all again.
but, no.
we're not fucking going to are we?
wankerz.
and seriously, i thought you might stick up for it a bit. but no, you gave up straight away.
fucking coward.
not in a good mood.
nothing can cheer me up right now.
